The NFL is adding little white handkerchiefs which will be worn on each hip of all eligible ball carriers. Grabbing and removing either one of these will replace tackling, to reduce injuries. All players engaged in blocking will be required to wear sumo outfits. Any player not wearing a sumo outfit who frightens the quarterback will be suspended without pay for four weeks.
Actually, the first part is okay because NFL players can't tackle worth crap anyway. If you want decent tackling you have to watch college football.
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